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How I Broke Free from the Fantasy I Built Around Him

On projection, emotional manipulation, and walking away with my power intact

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luminyou
May 22, 2025
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A close-up of two hands clasping gently — one wearing a delicate red heart bracelet. The hands appear tenderly connected, yet there’s a subtle sense of release, as if one is starting to let go. The image captures the emotional tension of longing, clarity, and the quiet strength it takes to walk away from a love built on fantasy. It visually mirrors the story of recognizing truth, setting boundaries, and reclaiming self-worth.
OpenAI. (2025). Image generated with DALL·E via ChatGPT

How do you let go of a fantasy you’ve been shaping in your mind for years?

It wasn't just the idea of love — but the illusion that he could provide it.

I kept hoping he’d grow into the version I saw in my head — the one who wanted what I wanted. A love that’s magnetic and real. Something that lights me up and makes me feel safe.

But that version didn’t exist. It was mine. A projection.

When I noticed it, I felt a wave of grief and disappointment. Deep down, I knew. My intuition had been whispering it for a while. But my logical mind — and my desire — wanted to go down the rabbit hole one last time, just to make sure.

This time, though, I entered with open eyes. Observing. Ready to face the truth with courage.

The despair still lingers.

I understand, it’s the disappointment. I was hoping that what I deeply desire — that sexual spark, the feeling of being lit up — would show up in the form of a man who wants what I want.

Not meaningless sex…

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